How To Move On From Failure, In A Nutshell
As children, we learn to get up when we fall, brush ourselves off, and try one more time. We scrape our knees and continue on to do something else entirely stupid. We take risks, and we grow as a result of our trials and triumphs.
But one thing adults never tell you when you’re a kid: failure is imminent.
You will fall on your face (metaphorically and physically), and not always gracefully. It will happen often, and there’s really nothing we can do about it.
At some point -- maybe not today or even tomorrow -- you will colossally mess up.
It will hurt; it might even seem devastating.
Yet, failure is simply a piece of the learning puzzle.
Wait. We already know this, we learned it as children. But somehow, as adults, we forget that it’s okay to make mistakes without beating yourself up.
Failure is a bruise; it’s not the end. It will fade, and life will go on.
My life journey has been long, trying, and difficult. I’ve felt broken at times. But I’ve never stopped trying to do what I love, and there’s nothing more rewarding.
You see, failure damages pieces of our self that we wouldn’t always consider.
First, you mess up.
Could be you wrecked your uninsured car driving home in a particularly icy snowstorm, or perhaps you didn't see any financial growth or success in your business ventures this year.
Whatever it is for you, failure will leave you feeling dazed at first. Only one word will come to mind: shit.
Feelings of sadness will hit like a ton of bricks, then anger sets in (maybe even blame) before a calm acceptance sweeps over you.
The lazy, calmness might be cozy, but it leads to fear.
Fear of starting over, fear of rejection, fear of facing your mistakes, and an underlying fear that maybe you’re not actually good enough.
Your confidence will shatter, even when you will yourself to be fine and keep pushing forward.
But it’s not the end of the proverbial tunnel, and there’s only one way to move on: keep trying.
When a writer has writer’s block or a person with depression is just having ‘one of those days’, the only thing to truly fix the issue is to keep going, with everything you’ve got.
Consistency is key in life, so you have to keep doing.
Only doing will allow you to move somewhere. Action promotes results. Otherwise, you’re stuck in limbo, a lazy sit-on-the-couch-and-sulk-all-day type of limbo.
So no matter how bad things seem, keep doing, moving, trying. Give it everything you’ve got! (It will feel like every ounce of your energy at first).
Just remember to take a break every once in awhile. Know when you need to step away, when you need to push forward, and when to readjust your strategy.
After all, no one can constantly run on fumes.
One day -- all of a sudden -- you will heal.
The secret? Success is also imminent -- no matter how minuscule -- but only if you do.
The late Carrie Fisher said it best, "Stay afraid, but do it anyway. What's important is the action. You don't have to wait to be confident. Just do it and eventually the confidence will follow."
Your confidence will grow, but only if you try. Then there’s no stopping you!